Finding a Calling: The Way Forward
As I bring this series to a close I suppose I should address the “elephant” that has been in the room since this series started. Where am I in my search? The deflecting response I offered in the first post is the most honest response given my history and circumstances. So what that question really entails is some kind of prediction, some kind of deeper spiritual insight. Perhaps something like, “God is leading me to…”
If you have been reading carefully, you can probably predict my response, or lack thereof. However, I will offer another list of three, more to the point than what I offered in the fourth post. First, I am highly motivated to study Christian apologetics, especially as it relates to science and modern culture. Second, there’s tremendous need and interest in this subject that does not seem to be shared by most of the church. Witness the growth in apologetic programs all over the country. Ministries like Stand To Reason, Reasons To Believe, and the nascent Ratio Christi are just some of the ever-growing list of para-church ministries in this field. Third, given the first two, I can’t quit. Am I “gifted” for this type of ministry? Who knows? My history and current lack of prospects could be caused by any of the following. (1) I am not suited to this ministry. (2) I am not YET suited to this ministry. (3) Avenues of ministry are rare because much of the church has not awakened to the need.
So I must simply continue. Studying, reading, listening, and waiting. If I ever get a chance to serve, then I will know the wait and process was worth it. If I never do, then everything I’ve written and studied will simply have been God’s means for keeping me close and grounded. Either way, I can’t lose. The future might hold more disappointment, but I will make bold prediction: I will not lose my faith and I will not stop growing closer to my Savior.